Easter/April First!

Happy Easter!

Easter is probably one of the most important holidays to the Christian faith. The holiday is to celebrate the death of Christ Jesus who resurrected from the dead three days later. As I talked about in a previous blog post for Spring, lots of the symbolism we use is taken from pagan traditions of Spring. While eggs and bunnies are not Christian originated symbols, they are used as a representation for rebirth- or the acceptance of this event that Jesus died and rose for those who believe. Easter does not have a set date, but again has roots in a somewhat rather pagan way of deciding it's date. 

Astronomers wanted to set a date that coincided with Passover originally. So, Easter is the first Sunday after the Paschal Full Moon. The Paschal Full Moon varies year to year but is usually within two days of the actual  full moon. This is why we can celebrate the holiday in March or in April! 

Some people who follow Ostara- or the first day of Spring decide to celebrate this holiday on Easter instead because of the symbolism and ease of traditions. 

April Fool's Day is Here!

April 1st is regarded as a day of pranks and tricks, and the United States isn't alone. Many other places have their ways of trickery at or around the date. Some say the saying began sometime in the Middle Ages where some of Europe would celebrate the New Year the week leading to April 1st, and those who celebrated at January 1st would call those who celebrated later "fools" for doing such silly things. Throughout history April 1st has been regarded as the Day of Fools, Flemish poet Eduard de Dene in 1539 wrote of a nobleman who sent his servants on foolish errands on this date. On April 1, 1698, people were tricked into seeing "Washing the Lions" at the Tower of London after getting tickets.

So whatever you do and where ever you go just be on the lookout and don't take things too seriously. Chances are people are out for an innocent laugh.

Reducing Stress

Stress Reducing Ideas

Everyone has stress in their life. Stress can be healthy even if you cannot directly control it. It can motivate you, drive up healthy adrenaline for excitement, and eve give you a healthy challenge. But what if stress gets to be too much? What if it starts to weigh you down?

First, you must determine the causes to solve any problem. If it's uncontrollable, such as bills, a different outlook may be the only way of calming yourself. Perhaps you can also make a list and prioritize the spending. It could ease your mind.

Other types of stress are situation in which you can remove yourself if you can. If you are having problems with someone else's affairs or getting involved where it's not for you to be in then the best solution is to back away from it. 

Stress can just sometimes add up and can leave a mark on you or perhaps just make you feel bogged down even after you handle everything you just accomplished. Finding ways to calm down from this is pretty simple, but some people have trouble just letting tension go.

If stress is bottled up too much and you become too surrounded by stress without relieving yourself of it you can affect your health, mental state, relationships, even to the point of ignoring your duties. Practicing stress management everyday may not eliminate all unwanted stress, but it does make it better and easier to cope with.

Ideas to Reduce Stress

1. Start eating healthier and exercising. Take a walk, drink more water, eat proper portions, have more vitamins and minerals in the foods you eat, etc. The body and mind will cope better.

2. Talk about it. If something is stressing you, keeping it in doesn't do any good for anyone. This can effect anyone mentally if it is put back long enough.

3. Be productive. Lot's of people handle stress better when they are keeping busy. It can help clear the mind or take their minds off things for a while. Whether it's cleaning or doing a project, you'll feel better after.

4. Read a book. It's calming, relaxing, and it's like a mini get-away. 

5. Watch T.V. While this seems very unproductive, watching your favorite program or a good movie is a good release for a while. 

6. Get a creative hobby. If you have the money you can sign up for local craft and art groups. If you don't or would rather have time to yourself instead of a social group you can pick up materials from your local art or craft store and begin creating! Great ideas on Pinterest or you can Google any number of tutorials. Or, if your like me, you can just use whatever your imagination gives you.

7. Spirituality. Whether it's church, a religious group, or just looking into scripture from holy books, more often then not you will find what you are looking for that may ease your mind. Connecting with your beliefs is a great way to keep stress at bay.

8. Meditation. You can view my meditation page HERE or you can look up other ways meditation and reflection can calm you. Meditation is a great way to relax!

9. Listen to music. Not only relaxing and a good way to get your mind off things, sometimes you can also connect with the lyrics or feelings behind certain songs that make you feel better overall.

10. Get out of the house! Go connect with nature, take a car ride in a scenic route, go on an adventure! 

11. Learn to say 'no' or ask for help. Everyday tasks will cause stress. But when we overextend ourselves we tend to flip out. Learn to say 'no' if projects are too much on top of the others you are involved in and if a project or task is just too much for you to handle yourself ask for help.

Unhealthy Ways to Cope with Stress

I'm sure some of these are a given, but you would be surprised how many people do these things to manage stress!

1. Drinking or doing drugs. While enjoying a small drink is harmless, in excess it can be dangerous and even escalate feelings of being down. Drugs even in recreational fun are NOT good. Downers, uppers- all play a part on the body, not to mention are expensive to use even if it's legal (weed being legal now in some states). It's much better to be constructive and not waste time or money getting these to manage your stress.

2. Shopping. Ok, ok, sometimes it is awesome for us to shop. But think about it. Just because your stressed will spending money on things you don't need constructive? Buyers remorse sometimes comes after these shopping sprees. Or perhaps you spend more then what you really have out of want. It causes problems. If you are smart about it and you really don't spend a lot for a pick-me-up, then more power to you! But beware if your a habitual spender at stores. Probably isn't a healthy way to deal.

3. Reacting the wrong way. Taking it out on people, causing different types of "crazy" making conversation and destructive talk can ruin relationships. Be aware of how you deal with stress when speaking with others about the confrontations they may be a part of. Be careful and constructive in the way you talk and propose ideas so you can solve the stress.

4.Eating. This isn't making healthy habits- this is someone who eats because of their mood. Ice cream, chocolate and sweets do release a chemical in the brain that makes us feel better, but often afterwards we feel horrible about the choice. If you do this, which many do, find healthy snacks to replace these with. After some time it'll be a healthy habit instead of gorging on something that can impact your health in large amounts.

5.Keeping it to yourself. I sort of explained this before in things to do. It's easier to talk to people then retaining the tension. It could be a friend, a family member, or even a professional. Keeping stress in that you can't manage often festers on the person and makes everything worse. Even if the stress is people-induced, find a calm point to talk rationally about it.

While we all go through some level of stress, you don't need it to rule your life. Prepare a daily routine that takes care of you. It doesn't need to take hours. Sometimes even taking an hour to unwind and calm from the day is enough to make you feel much better!

. 

Healthier May Equate to Happier

Diet Changing To Better Health 

Seems that fitness and healthier eating are a trend nowadays. While activity and healthier eating may contribute to weight loss and and a better physical feeling, having more vitamins and nutrients may also make one feel more happy with themselves. 

I took a plunge into fitness and healthy eating a couple years ago. I was tired of not finding clothes that fit and the one's that I did want I couldn't find my size. I was hurting all the time even though I had an active job at Disney. I made it a goal of mine to get fit and loss the weight. I paid for a one-on-one personal trainer at a training gym and started eating like I should have been all along. I cut portions, cut calories to about 1200 a day (what I needed for my goal and my activity level)  and lost almost 80 pounds, gained muscle, and felt AMAZING. 15 pounds from my goal I met someone, moved, lost my job and got pregnant. I didn't have the funds even with my new job to always eat right. I still don't at the moment, but the focus is still there. I'm just under 200 now, up from the 165 at my best. When we move in the next couple weeks I will be focusing on my eating habits. Where I am now I have limited room and area to work on good food. It's... a disaster to say the least with the people I live with. I'll update my progress as I start again to better health.

Until then, whether or not you want to lose a little or a lot, it's undeniable the health benefits of eating better. It does make you feel better. Your energy will greater. Your outlook may also improve. You may even save money in the process.

Add some or all of these and watch what happens!

I have been hearing a great idea to cut out some starch and calories all over Pinterest and food shows. I love the idea of mashed cauliflower instead of potatoes! I got this recipe from http://lowcarbdiets.about.com/od/lowcarbsidedishes/r/cauliflowermash.htm

Ingredients:

• raw Cauliflower - a medium head makes about a pound of florets
• any combination of butter, milk, cream, or whatever you use when you make mashed potatoes - about 1/4 cup
• salt and pepper
• If you have low carb "instant mashed potatoes", add up to 1/4 cup for texture*
• Options: minced garlic (a clove or two); garlic powder (1/2 to 1 teaspoon); cheese

Preparation:

*I like to use instant "potatoes" made for low carb diets, such as Dixie Carb Counters Instant Mashers. Other people use a small amount of real potato or instant potatoes to improve the texture. But you don't need any of these things.

Break the cauliflower up into florets, or just chop. I like to cook it in the microwave in a container that I prepare and serve it in, but you can steam it. Cook it until it's tender -- a fork should easily pierce it.

The easiest thing to do is to add the rest of the ingredients to the container the cauliflower is cooked in, and then use a stick (hand) blender to put it all together. Or you can put it all in a regular blender or food processor.

Assuming 4 servings from a pound of cauliflower, each will have about 3 grams of usable carbohydrate plus three grams of fiber. The calories will depend on what else you add.

Of course, you can add things like some cheese, garlic, or chives! I'm looking forward to this soon.

Be Responsible

Always remember- whatever attitude, demeanor, or focus you have- you are responsible for how you deal with situations and your reactions. Be aware of your energy and let yourself shine!

I also added another page tonight about meditation. Check it out :)

It's The Small Things...

The Small Things Are What Counts...

Yesterday my fiancee told me "I'm always thinking of you when I see little things you would like..." He always brings me small things especially after work. It may be a diet soda I like, some chocolate after mentioning a craving the day before, even the smallest wire chicken planter from a feed store near home that we always pass- and I always commented on how cool they were. (I have a strange fascination with chickens for a kitchen but this planter is awesome for outdoors!) We both have a hard time with his work schedule and with very little spendable money on any sort of fun he tries hard to make me happy in his own way. It's never overlooked. I always thank him. 

We had a fight one night and we didn't have food. Well, he had a frozen meal and I had nothing left. I was peeved and throwing an attitude. He had to go out and get something for the car, but when he returned, my fiancee had a reusable shopping bag full of salad stuff for me. Not only did he know I was indeed need of food, but paid special attention to my need of salads and healthy food I often eat. It was really awesome.

I have always said it was the little things. The little things that make up life, happiness, intrigue, fun... If you wait for the big things to be happy you may always end up disappointed. You could be waiting for a long time passing up opportunities, or the big moments come only to be disappointed that they didn't go as planned.

Again, as many blogs before I mentioned it's those positive things. Seeing the positive, being positive. Almost like being a young kid again. Everything has wonderment. Learn to see the world that way again and people will notice. It may seem silly at first, but when those little things make you happy you begin passing that little bit of energy to those around you and it spreads. Smiles, good deeds, anything. 

I saw The Hobbit finally today and a quote Gandulf said really hit me.

This picture comes from http://www.thereturnedmissionary.com

People often forget they can make a difference even while having little to nothing. Actions are just as valuable and can be bigger then a lump sum to one charity versus good and positive actions that spread and can really hit someone who needs it and changed their day- even life- forever.

Looking for Good Things?

Good Things are Always Around You Somewhere...

Blessings, gifts, what you worked hard for, what you were given. These are little pockets of things in life that we should always remember no matter how little we actually have.

What gives us the best feelings? Is it lots of money, love, possessions? What about yourself? 

People often spend a lot of time worrying about what they don't have instead of looking around at what they do have. Most of us are lucky enough to have food everyday while a good chunk of the world's population has very little food. Most of us are lucky to have a roof over our heads in a home setting. There are plenty of homeless out there in the world that would give anything for a good place of residence. 

Part of being positive comes from your optimism toward your situation. If your unhappy with your settings and your things you have power to change it. Dreams, hard work, networking, dedication. If one is unhappy but refuses to try to even make small changes to be positive and change their situation, then perhaps one must look inward to the roots of themselves. 

Whether it's meditation or prayer- a refection of self- find what is causing such negative balance. Usually, in my experience with people, it's not looking for what one already has that makes a future look so bleak.

Even a person who has their health has something fortunate that many others cannot say they have. Buddhists follow a path in which they will never own anything other then the robes they wear, yet they find peace. This is because possessions, in their faith, bog down the path toward enlightenment and happiness. They have an inner peace knowing who they are and what they work towards.

It's harder in societies like ours. You need money to exchange, a vehicle to commute to make that money, and we feel as if we need luxury items to destress. 

Why not start by looking for the good already in our daily lives? You wake up- that's one thing that billions of others before us cannot say they have. Today. Alive, breathing, seeing such amazing technological advances that a hundred years ago would have never been plausible. Even day to day items that make life faster and easier- even safer! 

You could look around you no matter what your circumstance and think to yourself: I have a bed, blankets, a television, a roof, some mode of transportation or blessed with two legs to get me around, luxuries (game systems, junk foods, designer jeans...) a job, a family, a friend... a chance to change.

Focus on your positive everyday, even if you are satisfied with life. For today it's here but tomorrow is never promised.

Personal Inspiration

My Personal Inspiration for the Day!

Today was overall a good day despite fighting a headache all day and my one year old having tantrums near the end. She had been well all day- very happy even- like she normally is. As normal children do, perhaps, she had her meltdown at grandma's. It was fine, though. She's perked back up!

Since we are getting ready to move into a new place we decided today to scour Lowe's. They had red mulch on sale for a dollar a bag, so we went and picked up 6 of them. We would have gotten more but the left over papers from last nights paper delivery too up too much room in the back.

Well, while walking around and collaborating ideas I happened to find a gold mine in the flooring area. 

I had seen a great idea on Pinterest (yes, I'm a Pinterest fiend. I need to put a button up soon...) to make stepping stones by personalizing them as mosaics. I want this to be one of my first projects for the outside along with getting stuff ready for gardening and just having outdoor plants. Yes, my renters are THAT awesome to us! Anyway, I found where the broken and tile on sale was on shelves in the middle of the tile center- pieces as low as a quarter. How could I pass this up for what I wanted? I even walked down a full isle and picked up 2 black tiles for .30 a piece. The best part: this Lowe's was selling BUCKETS of broken tile for $5.00. YES. $5.00!!!! all in 5 gallon buckets! Some were mixed a little, but each bucket had an inventory of what they included. The one I first liked was almost $20 worth. Great natural colors all around. After I noticed this on the paper on the bucket I looked over the others. There was a bucket worth $200- but only had one type of tile... and I didn't need THAT much of one color. The bucket I got was best for me. It was $98 worth of tile- 3 types- including MARBLE. So, needless to say, I probably don't need any more natural or soft browns for my projects for a while! I'll be sure to post everything once I get going and tweek the How-To a bit ;) Not to bash the blogger who originally put up the tutorial, but I really REALLY have another way of doing it and make them awesome.

The biggest problem we are having with the move so far: The electric provider DOES service the place we are getting- SECO- the renters know for sure, of course, because they have the power on right now. But the address they keep on giving is wrong and the number to the power box is not the one SECO has. Urgh. A minor setback that we need to fix soon with management to sort out. But nonetheless will get done. Who said everything was going to be smooth, eh? It happens and everything will work out. 

My lessons for the day:

Get pumped up about anything happening in your life. It may be as simple as a yummy meal you plan for the end of the week (I do this often) or a project that you are about to do in the coming weeks. You don't need to spend a lot of money to do this, but you can always shop around for items that you think you may need and look for those hidden deals you'll never notice otherwise. Try not to pay full price for everything and you'll likely get more excited about things. For instance, you need shrimp for that meal. It may be an extra stop, but scowering your local market ads you may come across a sharp deal that is lower then it's competitor's that perhaps you shop often. Maybe you want to buy a really nice new shelving unit for a room. Why not see if you can find something similar for cheaper- OR- make it yourself? Even at home improvement centers they can cut boards to the specifications you need. Doing a bit of homework, looking around and doing it yourself can cost you far less then buying it outright if you can. I've got a list going of things we will be doing together that will save us possibly hundreds when it comes time. Until then, I have a small list of things to do very soon and long term to work on as we can get the stuff. And we BOTH are excited about it!

Thoughts on Karma

Thoughts on Karma

Most people in today's society would describe Karma as "what goes around comes around". For some Christian types it's "God's blessings or punishment" and that Karma itself doesn't exist.

Personally, I believe both thoughts to be correct on the subject. Karma is the word to describe both in a much simpler way. 

The word and theology of Karma is rooted in Indian religions of Buddhism, Hinduism, and a few others. While each have a slightly different take on Karma, the basics are cause and effect based on actions and deeds. Basically, you do something wrong it'll come back to you. Do something good and good will come back to you.

Other religions have versions of this. Sometimes it's a way to a peaceful afterlife by doing good things, sometimes the effects of the cause are bestowed upon the person in a greater degree. Whatever your personal preference is it's just always good to rack up good Karma. 

It's my belief no one can have good Karma by trying to get it- you have to be doing a good deed without expectation of receiving a prize or something good coming back to you.

Good deeds come in all shapes and sizes and with our previous lesson on positivity you can learn to integrate the two in daily life and just feel better as a person. 

Here are some ideas that you can start doing to get into the habit of selflessly helping others:

1. Hold the door open for anyone coming or going
2. Saying a sincere "thank you" to anyone you meet who gives you a service (sometimes someone really needs to hear that they are appreciated!)
3. Donate to change jars at stores, donate whatever you can- no matter how small- to charities.
4. Give items like old clothes and such to people- not JUST friends- and skipping the thrift store donation box. (Most thrift stores make a profit and still requires someone who may not have enough to fork over cash- but nothing wrong with it if it's a good shop or you have no one to give to!)
5. Give up your time to help someone who asks- even if they aren't the most pleasant person (just use proper judgement if the help would otherwise cripple something of yours if the person is just not a good person... by that I mean you don't want to give a few hundred bucks to a person who says they need money and they spend it poorly and never repays it, or someone who would likely steal your vehicle) A small amount is a better loss then a big one with these types.
6. Give encouragement to those around you. Your positive words bring positive thoughts to others.
7. Always donate a couple cans of food to food drives when possible. They go a long way with what others afford even if a couple cans is all you can.
8. Avoid gossip and talking down about others. Negative thoughts only breed negative things. 
9. Learn to let things go. If someone does you wrong they will get their share of Karma no matter how good they may seem. Planning revenge and even acting on it is negative and puts you in a worse place with Karma.
10. Always aim to ask how someone is doing when they look down. Sometimes all they need is a simple talk and that's it.

I'm also a firm believer that Karma works when you think no one else sees you. If you are doing something behind someone's back without them knowing but it would hurt them if they found out Karma will not be so kind. Whether it's your intent to hurt that person or not, doing something that's wrong typically will still follow you. It's good just to avoid this.

Karma doesn't just affect the person, but the people around if need be, possessions of that person, even the social aspect. In turn, the person receiving the butt end of Karma can endure a lot of frustrations, hurt and pain- even loss. 

All in all, watch out for each other and yourselves. It makes for a better world altogether and it's a lot easier!

First Day of Spring!

Happy Ostara and First Day of Spring!

Today is the first day of Spring and the rain is falling here at home!

Spring is a renewal marking the end of winter and warmer temperatures. Flowers bloom and plants grow hardy at this time. It's a regrowth of nature for the next few months. Both light and darkness are in perfect balance- day and night- and each day after the day will grow longer. Fertility is also important in this season. Flowers bloom to be pollinated and flourish more plants of themselves by seeds. You probably notice more birds building nests and chicks up in the trees. Baby animals will begin to appear!

Easter is a big holiday where we celebrate in the Spring. I'll post more later when it actually IS Easter, but some quick lore first. Easter for most Christians and some others is the rising of Jesus Christ from the tomb where he was buried 3 days later. There were no eggs involved, no Easter Bunny giving baskets of goodies. These traditions are actually rooted in old pagan tradition for Spring- called Ostara. 

Today marks the day of Ostara. Many people give thanks to nature for fertility and the warmth that is upon us. The history is different for each place in Europe, but the name is derived from Germanic roots. The Easter Bunny as well is German. In the 16th century bunnies and hares were thought to lay eggs on Easter, and the Easter Bunny would deliver colored eggs to reward children for good behavior. A rabbit or hare hopping across fields were watched intently for their behavior as their patterns were thought to hold symbols to what the year may bring.

Eggs themselves have always been a symbol of fertility,a resurrection and continuation of life. Later, Christians adopted this symbol as to recognize the resurrection of Jesus. 

While not quite Easter just yet (Easter actually follows moon phases to be determined what day it falls on each year) we can all take a moment and celebrate Spring as it had come again! 

Maybe even reflect on what renewal means to us.

Some of us will get rid of clutter from the year in an annual Spring cleaning of our home. A "fresh start" to a coming year and cycle- a chance for new things, a chance to rid ourselves of things we don't use or need.

We don't need to limit ourselves to just physical clutter. Much like the New Year, we can take a moment and figure out what we don't need in our lives. What will make us "fresh" in thought and perspective. Maybe it's the people we hang out with that poison us, or perhaps something you do that you can change- rebirth who you are. Have a resurrection of self. This is the time to do just that. 

Today is also another reminder of good things!

Today is Mr. Rogers birthday!

Fred Rogers (March 20, 1928 – February 27, 2003) is most notable for his show "Mr.Roger's Neighborhood" which started in 1968 and spanned three decades. His shows taught patience, morality and compassion. While a religious man, he had a soft spot for children and thought it was important to give them a safe place despite how the world was.

I remember watching him while I was little. I loved the show! It had a bit of magic and intrigue, but it was subtle and soft. No loud noises, crazy colors- just simple. You always expected him to come in, change his shoes- then talk to trolley.  It was a great loss, in my opinion, to lose a show and a man like this who always wanted children to be their best.

“If you could only sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.”

Positivity Training

Positivity Training

I think all of us need to be reminded on the power of positive thinking and negative thinking. All of us have probably thought negative thoughts before. Now, I'm not talking about realistic expectations here. Obviously if you have a project due by Monday at 9am and it's Sunday at 10 till midnight and you needed a whole weekend to finish it... well... positive minded or not it's either not going to be finished or not very good as it could have been. 

Think about the last time a situation arised where you may have felt you had no control. Maybe you were crunched on time due to something you couldn't control, it rained when your plans were going for a sunny day or people were trying to drag you into the middle of some drama you couldn't care less about or have any part of. 

Negative thoughts breed negativity- in action, motivation, thought and reaction. If you are overburdened, thinking you can't possibly manage is lowering your perception of self- a negative thought form. You become sluggish, unwilling to try harder, and motivation escapes quickly.  Putting yourself into a situation causing negative thoughts toward someone usually causes negativity to lash out on you (also known as karma, but that's a future blog). Negativity can also become a daily habit to everything. "Everything that can go wrong will go wrong." Very true, but not the way to anticipate life. 

Positive thoughts- motivate, inspire, are uplifting and it becomes easier to learn even if failure is the ultimate ending. I often help my fiancee on Saturday nights at the warehouse getting the Sunday newspaper together. I also own a 2003 Toyota Echo- which about 600 Sunday papers have to fit into. Besides the wear on the car we often have to contend with "where do we fit all those papers?". My other half is often less then positive in most circumstances unless I fall apart. I'm usually the beacon of hope in situations. Although sometimes he still manages to muster some sort of creative and useful way to get work delivered, I'm typically the brains when he has the case of the negatives. "We will make it work" or "we can try to do it this way" and even "we've done it this way before, we can do it again" seems to be my cheers in stressful times like this. 

Some theists and spiritualists often think of negative thoughts as real thought forms that become just as real as the spirits they have faith in. Real forms that follow and weigh on you, breeding more and more until you either are consumed by overwhelming depression about everything or you make the change to chase them away. Sounds about right when you think about how it feels to be in a slump, doesn't it?

How do you begin if you are caught always feeling this way? Many ways, and hopefully future blogs will help more- but let's begin by the simplest way. Training positive focuses. We can't change what is going to happen. What we can do is change the way we think and react to what life throws at us. My car will inevitably at some point get a flat tire out on the paper route as it has many times before. I shouldn't be thinking about how horrible this will be. Dwelling will only stress a person. But what I can do is be prepared for it and know I can replace it and get going again. It may make me run late- but by God- it will get done.

We had tip money from the route this Christmas season to get our new place. The week of Christmas a front  wheel bering exploded on the route leaving the car inoperable for three weeks. All the money my fiancee had gotten was now to go to the car to replace the whole hub assembly. All I could think of was my child's first Christmas and I couldn't get her anything, we couldn't get out of this blasted place I was so sick of, and I couldn't travel to see my family who was looking forward to seeing their first grandchild. My fiancee was my rock through this time. He wasn't happy about it either, but he made due. He fixed the car piece by piece, borrowed a vehicle from friends to get his job done and for us to travel, even one of the people he worked with played "secret Santa"- leaving us with a bunch of gifts while he was inside in the truck we borrowed so baby could have things for Christmas. My biggest positive thought that always got me through this and other times: It was great that we had the extra money or we probably wouldn't have the job or car anymore.

FIND the positive. There is ALWAYS something to be positive about- even if it's just changing your attitude toward the situation. 

Not "oh well" but more like "we will get it done", "everything will work out" and "it may happen, but we will meet it head on if and when it does". 

Your goal: incorporate more positive thinking when you feel a negative thought coming on- and most importantly- ACT positively toward the situation.

Money Saving Tips Part 1

Money Saving Tips Part 1

I'm sure I'll have more money saving tips later, but I really wanted to share something that I have learned about maximizing grocery shopping.

I love saving money where I can but we all need to eat and we all love to eat well. I consider myself on a fixed budget when it comes to food shopping. I have food stamps due to the amount of people I feed- three- and the amount of money my fiancee makes. Although he makes enough as if both of us would work a full time job, the expenses keeping the car afloat and his job security take a huge toll on what we have left at the end of the week. 

I have shopped a few different places in hopes to find good deals, even going as far as strict shopping at Save-A-Lot for a couple weeks. 

Here's my observations and what I have learned from trying different methods.

Regional chain here in the south east, Publix, gives me both quality and quantity for MOST things food related. Every week they offer great Buy One, Get One (BOGO) deals. If I shopped for the same thing or off brand at Save-A-Lot I may pay a dollar less for one of the items, but the extra dollar couple get me two! Great for non-perishables or things you go through quickly and use a lot of. Now, if you COUPON most times you can find a manufacture's coupon for the same item on sale for BOGO. 

So let's do some math. Let's say it's a BOGO sale on a box of pasta. This box of pasta is... $1.30. So, usually $2.60 on two boxes, but this sale now is $1.30 for two- saving you $1.30. You now have a coupon that says buy any 2 of this box of pasta and save $.30! The 'free' one IS included in the purchase. You now get $2.60 worth of product for only $1.00- with a savings of $1.60!

Most stores also 'double' a manufacture's coupon with an IN STORE coupon. So let's say you had the manufacture's coupon, the BOGO sale and you got one of the ad papers with the bonus savings of another... $.20 on any ONE box of this type of pasta. Since the one box was "free", take another $.20 off of the $1.00 and you now only pay $.80 for the two boxes! 

If I went to Save-A-Lot they may beat individual prices on most items, but you wouldn't buy 2 for the same deal- especially coupled with coupons. 

Wal-mart has that same mentality but a slight more expensive the Save-A-Lot with some items more expensive then my Publix. They accept manufacture's coupons but they rarely if ever have any BOGO sales. If you feel like price comparison shopping and multiple trips Wal-Mart isn't always a bad choice especially if you buy large amounts, but I would check the regional stores first. Wal-Mart, however, is usually better with taxed items on your grocery list- such as shampoos, shavers, toilet paper, etc. Unless you can scope out a good deal at your regional chain try Wal-Mart or Save-A-Lot for some of these other items. 

Wal-Mart for me personally has always been more expensive when I bargain shop at my local Publix. 

Meats, however, are usually less expensive per cut and pound at Wal-Mart and especially Save-A-Lot. You can't usually find the expensive cuts as easily and sometimes fears of quality present itself. Always check your meats and freeze them immediately when you get home. Save-A-Lot is always sketchy to me, but I usually buy Tyson chicken when going there and once they have restocked if I'm not using it right away. A pack of chicken breast here may only cost me $4.00 versus Publix at $9.00 for the same thing. It pays to go look around.

The problem with Save-A-Lot and other dollar stores: People buy what they need to eat and feed a family. Often times when on a very low budget they aren't concerned with what is IN the food they find on the shelves, rather, that they like it, they can buy in bulk, and feed their families. Go into a Save-A-Lot and walk around and read the packages of cheese products, pastas, processed meats, and the like. Cheese flavored cheese?! The ingredients are much more like plastic additives! Cream cheese- unless it's Philly- is NOT real cream cheese. Pastas are full of anything but flour and turn out gummy. And who knows what's really in those chicken nuggets. Heck, my roommates bought a package of huge hot dogs from there and each hot dog was 800 calories and full of fat and sugars and names unpronounceable. 

I'm an advocate for healthier alternatives but I understand the dilemma. Spending what little you have to buy as much as you can so you don't go hungry. But how is that really going to make you feel in the long run after meal after meal? How much more will you have to shell out for health care and how long will your life expectancy drop due to poor nutrition, additives, and just corn and flour? Our society eats corn through almost everything. While it's fast growing and solves hunger itself by producing anything with corn in it- especially animals- this problem only exacerbates diabetes, obesity, and malnutrition even worse then the corn syrup problem itself.  

Get what you can for your money. Cut portions for healthier eating and saving on money. Win/win. Shop around, look for deals and COUPON. Lot's of sites give out printables and pick up store ads- even look at store ads online. Plan. If you can freeze it, pick it up on sale. Put back if you can to spend less throughout the month. So many blogs that walk you through these things, even couponing sites with cheat guides in your area. It PAYS to do your homework and you'll be saving money in no time.

Patience

Patience

In this fast-paced world you will find not many people practice this simple word. Personally, I find it kinda sad to see people have to hurry through a line as if they are entitled to special treatment that no one else is entitled to. As a child most of us are taught to take turns. Wait our turn. As we blossom into the world as adults you would think we have learned this lesson by then. In fact, if you ever people watch you may notice a large number of people acting as if they never learned this.

At one point or another we get to where we are going regardless how fast we go. In society, technology has hardwired our brains to want things faster, instantly. Instant gratification. Web pages are a good example. If we go from high speed internet where a web page loads in less then a second, then attempt to go to an area where the internet connection is less then favorable you can expect load times on web pages several seconds long or more. Most of us have dealt with this and even gotten annoyed with it. I have. Guilty as charged.

Sometimes we are in a hurry in general. We leave work during rush hour and expect everyone to have the same goal. To get home. Go the speed limit. Then we encounter people who may not have been patient and caused an accident in their rush to get home. Or perhaps just a traffic jam from a large amount of people heading toward their destination. People here become impatient. Why?

We are tired. When people become tired they grow impatient and forget that everyone else is doing the same thing they are. That we must keep our cool or create a hostile environment for those around us. Road rage ensues and people try to speed. All in all, not a favorable feeling. In reality, we all are stacked up in lines taking turns getting to our destinations.

What about long term goals? How patient are we? Some get so impatient they give up. Others practice this better then standing in a five minute line. They have the concept of patience and hard work, but forget the same practice in daily life as if they are not one in the same. 

I have always been more patient then some others. I have been told I have patience of a saint even! Working at theme parks while still maintaining a steady guest line speed builds you up to the expectation that everyone gets a chance once they get in that line. Of course, situations change, rules moved around, and then your patience goes out the door as you stress a limited amount of time to see who you can for the goal character and you then notice the other side of patience that is quite frustrating. Those who don't consider others behind them at all, taking more time on purpose because they are entitled to take as much time as they see fit and not caring if the children or families get their turn. 

All in all what breaks patience most of the time is selfishness. 

Now, about me here. My long term goals are about to come true. Me and my fiancee have been working hard on getting a place to rent of our own for quite some time. We started out with friends and moved many times. We had our baby and lost the biggest house we were renting due to my loss of job at the time. During these few months after the baby was the worse practice of patience I ever had. I became bitter. We were homeless and had to ask for help and still had nothing and no space for ourselves. I hated knowing people we knew having things. Not a hate for them, but a hate we couldn't do anything no matter how hard we had tried. Fast forward a bit closer to now. My patience fluctuates. Some days are harder then others with the roommates we have, the place we live in. But we have been working hard and setting goals. We lapse sometimes, but hard work and keeping some sort of focus is producing results. We have a place of our own set up and being remodeled JUST FOR US. A single-wide trailer but a fantastic yard and enough room for the three of us. Plus a large kitchen for me! We looked into the other trailers around us, even really wanting the double wide next to us because I love room- I love extra space. The landlord who runs the park had been slowly fixing this abandon trailer for a long, long time- but never making the effort to rent it out anytime soon to keep up with the other tenants in the park. After getting word we were really ready to get into one she set off to remodel this place and FOR US- keeping in mind we had the baby and we were good people (not saying everyone here is bad, but lot's of unfavorable types). She knew what we wanted and needed, thinking of us specifically to get the most private, largest yard, and only porched home here. This place never had carpet- she's putting that in. She let me pick out colors for the walls instead of prepainting. She is letting me do whatever I want with the yard, letting me paint murals in the bathrooms and really loving my ideas for decor and space management in this place. No one at the park renting gets much of these "OK's" but she's letting me make it comfortable and homey! 

Still a couple weeks left and I'm excited. Lot's of work ahead of me, but actually getting this place has been a long time coming for us. 

How does my story fit into "patience"?  All the money problems we had the past few months have set us back. We always looked into places for us. What could have changed if we had hurried? Perhaps the problems would have still occurred while just getting into a place and we could have lost everything again. Maybe we would be in a different trailer here with no allowance on what we could do, no yard for the baby and my wanting to garden. I would have made do, but maybe I wouldn't have been so happy after all for long term. This opportunity finally came. It came out of patience, waiting, planning. It's still hard- I want this place NOW but I know they are working hard on making it perfect for us. Every day, hour, minute- even second- is closer to getting what we NEED. Not just jumping ahead to what we would have wanted.

Whatever you do today, this week and months for now remember: Be patient. Learn and be aware of others and how they are waiting just like you. Share, take turns and be happy about it. You'll get there.